BATTLESTAR GALACTICA MISSILE LAUNCHER

Battlestar Galactica was everyone’s favorite television Star Wars rip-off in 1978. Especially cool among the Battlestar offerings were a series of missile launchers known individually as the Viper, the Cylon Raider, the Scarab, and the Stellar Probe. Young boys routinely forgot they actually asked for the Millennium Falcon for Christmas once they saw the sweet, sweet projectile action.

It takes just a few jabbed eyes, some torn intestines and the death of a child to bring down a party, and that’s just what happened in January 1979, when the battle cruiser missiles were finally recalled. Most of the accidents were caused by salvos that went tragically off target. Mattel, working with the CPSC, announced that the fatality occurred when a young boy in Atlanta fired one of the missiles into his mouth. The missiles, at one and a quarter inches, were just about the ideal size to land in one’s esophagus and stay there. The boy’s parents thought so too. They sued Mattel for $14 million.

A spokesperson from the CPSC explained that “the barrel shape of the toy seemed to invite children to put it in their mouths.” Something you could apparently say in 1979 without too much snickering. After the injuries, Mattel called for consumers to participate in a “Missile Mail-In,” which promised a free Hot Wheels car—a fair trade to anyone who disarmed.

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