LET’S GET ONE THING STRAIGHT: DAN PERES, EDITOR-IN-CHIEF OF DETAILS, IS NOT GAY.

But his magazine sure seems to be. Call him a professional fag-stag (the title of a December 2002 piece on homo-lovin’ heteros). Or maybe liken him to one of those “straight guys who get rich making gay porn.” (Profiled in the December 2002 issue.) When he took over as editor in 2000, Peres promised a magazine for men who “are interested in grooming.” So perhaps it’s not surprising that he’s ended up with a magazine for hairdressers. Straight ones, of course. A survey of recent articles: helpful tips on how to tell your girlfriend you’re gay (July 2002); an investigation of the plight of gay Republicans (November 2002); an exposé on hetero males who like to be, you know, sodomized (March 2003); and a profile of “arrow-straight” male transvestites (January/February 2003). This month, in an odd twist on a tried and true Maxim formula, Details presents a “special package” on Hollywood’s most well-endowed men, sure to delight 10 percent of its readers. The same 10 percent who showed up to Details premiere party for Showtime’s Queer as Folk. Rare attempts to butch up the magazine (by, say, putting Mike Tyson on the cover) have resulted in limp sales, while an issue featuring a shirtless, crotch-grabbing Justin Timberlake literally flew off the stands. For his part, Peres, denies reports that the fey magazine is finally coming out. “I’ll have Heather Graham’s nipple in the magazine,” Peres promises, “or Colin Farrell getting tons of ass-female ass!” Riiight.

How then to explain a recent cover on which the magazine asked its readers, “Have you had sex with Colin Farrell yet?” Perhaps this is a question we should pose to Details’ new sex columnist. Yep, he’s gay.

CLUB KING PETER GATIEN JUST CAN’T CATCH A BREAK. 

After years of police and Justice Department investigations, the former nightlife impresario and producer of A Bronx Tale was poised to return to his roots. According to Gatien, he and director Spike Lee had agreed to develop
a weekly television series set in a trendy New York nightclub. The fictional series, tentatively titled Limelight, after Gatien’s now padlocked clubs in London, Atlanta and New York, was to be a cross between “Moulin Rouge and Cheers,” featuring “a black DJ, a gay guy, and an aspiring actress.” (Which, come to think of it, sounds oddly like our fact-checking department.) Unfortunately for Gatien, his past caught up with him when his longtime nemesis, former New York Post columnist Jack Newfield, secured a meeting with Lee, and threatened to “ruin him” if the show were ever produced. According to Gatien, Newfield produced a series of his own clips about Gatien misdeeds, which later proved to be inaccurate. Soon afterward, Lee’s office called Gatien to say their deal was off. A positively miffed Gatien says he’s disappointed that Lee didn’t do the right thing, but he claims that plans for the show are continuing, thanks to interest from L.A.’s Endeavor agency.