i offered a "lede" to NYT:

I Luvs Scooter in the SpringTime
We duvs wontaaa let him fall

butt NYT don likee me baby,
so it all yurs

Jebediah, I take your word as holy writ which means a lot considering I'm an atheist. In short, I conclude you're a f*g which is the way I mispronounce gay. If you know Christopher Marlowe as the man who couldn't hold Shakespeare's jockstrap, you also know his critics could _prove_ he mispronounced the name of _love_. Getting stabbed to death in the head and misremembered as a traitor is all the proof a sane man needs in this life. I ain't out to prove nuthin' so I advise you not to read the Pentagon Papers which can only but piss off the Military-Industrial Complex. Instead, report to the masses on Tucker Carlson as Big Brother's Little Brother Who Wants To Tag Along so they give him an hour on MSNBC. Is Tucker a first name, a last name or a nickname? Explain his bad hair and how when he gets a haircut it ALWAYS looks like a haircut and Oh Those Clothes! Talk about what not to wear! Explain how his talk style and image undercut his position. In short, stick to what you know---- Dancing with The Stars.