(continued)

SAM CHAMPION
Sam Champion, it must be pointed out, is a weatherman, not a meteorologist. His broadcast degree enables him to participate in all of Good Morning America's best bits, like riding a mechanical bull rather poorly. And it's a good thing he's not confined to an X on the floor, because he provides the kind of diversity that's not about being black. On one episode he told viewers all about how Carrie ended up with Big in the Sex and the City finale. Another time he talked ebulliently with Ryan Seacrest about his dropping midnight balls ("I'm really glad I knew how to use the tools, but I was expecting power tools," Champion scolds). And in one magic moment, Champion participated in a cooking segment in which the chef directed him sternly, "Sam, toss this salad right here ... real gently."

MIKE MATHIS
As one YouTube poster astutely observed, "Mike Mathis [of WCCB in Charlotte, North Carolina] is without a doubt the craziest MFer I have ever seen on local TV." In 2004, not long after appearing on the air dressed as a snowflake and a flower and doing his best unintentional Chris Farley impersonation, Mathis sought treatment for alcohol and substance abuse. He insisted, however, that he had never been loaded on the air. No word on his condition when he engaged in the great local pastime of school bus racing at the local speedway. Is it so wrong that we can't distinguish between a man with a drug problem and a friend of Dorothy?